“There was a storm brewing as I walked along the dirt track home with my sister. Little did I know my life was about to change forever with a message I received from my own mind as we walked in our silence. It was my first reminder to remember: I am more than my physical self.”
Our house was on a farm and everyone on this farm was totally absorbed in their own world of sadness, grief, and I guess regrets. The unthinkable happened to me under the noses of my female carers. My father was abusing me and I was accepting his advances. I needed lots of love and I couldn’t get enough. This made me vulnerable to him.
My mother packed up and left. She couldn’t tolerate my father’s abuse towards her, hitting her to appease his controlling mother. She left my sister and me with my grandma. My father was devastated, used me to comfort him, and took me with him when he searched for our mother. On her return, my father and I were caught in bed, and so my isolation and separateness changed my life. Primary school was tough but high school offered me the knowledge and a better view of the world.
At seventeen, freedom at last. I was given a car: a means of escape. My self-confidence grew: my sister and old foes became friends. I was asserting myself and I was not going to be told what to do.
My Secret Self is a much-internalized story of my life and my impressions of the world around me. I keep my views of that world, and of other people, a secret. I feel misunderstood. If I shared my views, I feel I’d be laughed at. I will keep my biggest secret, a secret. I see magic in nature and nature can be trusted to support me in my times of trouble.
“A Exceptional Read of Deep Understanding by Cristella“
What can I say, this book held me from start to finish. Christine’s childhood experiences occurred in the 1960s and are not unlike some of what I went through in the 1950s. Thank God there is more communication and understanding between family members today. Christine felt unloved, I wonder if she discovered as she grew older that her mother did love her. I discovered with my mother it was me telling her repeatedly that I loved her before she was then able to tell me the same. She was in her 90s by then. Generations back people did not express their feelings. I live very much in the spirit and I deem that Christine does also. I smiled when she wrote toward the end that she wanted a son and desired to name him Julian. My choice for my first son was to be either that or Adrien. His father named him Peter.
My Italian name is Cristina (not my birth name of Crystal), and I have always known things that were impossible for me to humanly know. I live in the spirit and at times have heard, smelled or seen into the spiritual realm.
The hardships of this world are a necessary evil as they develop a strong and compassionate useful individual. This person will never stop learning and thrills to absorb all they can with pure delight.
Lastly, Christine has a special servitude for which she is not yet aware. God’s Word tells us that we are NO mistake.
Jeremiah 1:5 (NKJV) “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; Before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.”